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.If her conversation was light and trivial, it wassuade Miss Murray to come in, I wished Mr.Weston would amusing, and she was never at a loss for something to say, orgo, that she might not see him with me when she turned for suitable words to express it in.There was nothing pert orround; but, unfortunately, his business, which was to pay one flippant in her manner now, as when she walked with Mr.more visit to poor Mark Wood, led him to pursue the same Hatfield, there was only a gentle, playful kind of vivacity,path as we did, till nearly the close of our journey.When, which I thought must be peculiarly pleasing to a man of Mr.however, he saw that Rosalie had taken leave of her friends Weston s disposition and temperament.and I was about to join her, he would have left me and passed When he was gone she began to laugh, and muttered toon at a quicker pace; but, as he civilly lifted his hat in passing herself, I thought I could do it!her, to my surprise, instead of returning the salute with a stiff, Do what? I asked.ungracious bow, she accosted him with one of her sweetest Fix that man.smiles, and, walking by his side, began to talk to him with all What in the world do you mean?Contents Purchase the entire Coradella Collegiate Bookshelf on CD atAnne Bronte.Agnes Grey.http://collegebookshelf.net186 187 I mean that he will go home and dream of me.I have shot go down with a calm face, and smile, and laugh, and talkhim through the heart! nonsense yes, and eat, too, if possible, as if all was right, and How do you know? I was just returned from a pleasant walk. By many infallible proofs: more especially the look hegave me when he went away.It was not an impudent look Iexonerate him from that it was a look of reverential, tenderadoration.Ha, ha! he s not quite such a stupid blockhead as Ithought him!I made no answer, for my heart was in my throat, or some-thing like it, and I could not trust myself to speak. O God,avert it! I cried, internally for his sake, not for mine!Miss Murray made several trivial observations as we passedup the park, to which (in spite of my reluctance to let oneglimpse of my feelings appear) I could only answer by monosyl-lables.Whether she intended to torment me, or merely toamuse herself, I could not tell and did not much care; but Ithought of the poor man and his one lamb, and the rich manwith his thousand flocks; and I dreaded I knew not what forMr.Weston, independently of my own blighted hopes.Right glad was I to get into the house, and find myselfalone once more in my own room.My first impulse was tosink into the chair beside the bed; and laying my head on thepillow, to seek relief in a passionate burst of tears: there wasan imperative craving for such an indulgence; but, alas! I mustrestrain and swallow back my feelings still: there was thebell the odious bell for the schoolroom dinner; and I mustContents Purchase the entire Coradella Collegiate Bookshelf on CD atAnne Bronte.Agnes Grey.http://collegebookshelf.net188 189too often whisper that I was deceiving my own self, and mock-ing God with the service of a heart more bent upon the crea-ture than the Creator.Sometimes, such thoughts would give me trouble enough;but sometimes I could quiet them with thinking it is notthe man, it is his goodness that I love. Whatsoever things arepure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are hon-est and of good report, think on these things. We do well toworship God in His works; and I know none of them in whichso many of His attributes so much of His own spirit shines,Chapter 16.as in this His faithful servant; whom to know and not toappreciate, were obtuse insensibility in me, who have so littleThe substitution.else to occupy my heart.Almost immediately after the conclusion of the service,Next Sunday was one of the gloomiest of April days aMiss Murray left the church.We had to stand in the porch,day of thick, dark clouds, and heavy showers.None of thefor it was raining, and the carriage was not yet come.I won-Murrays were disposed to attend church in the afternoon,dered at her coming forth so hastily, for neither youngexcepting Rosalie: she was bent upon going as usual; so sheMeltham nor Squire Green was there; but I soon found itordered the carriage, and I went with her: nothing loth, ofwas to secure an interview with Mr.Weston as he came out,course, for at church I might look without fear of scorn orwhich he presently did.Having saluted us both, he wouldcensure upon a form and face more pleasing to me than thehave passed on, but she detained him; first with observationsmost beautiful of God s creations; I might listen without dis-upon the disagreeable weather, and then with asking if heturbance to a voice more charming than the sweetest music towould be so kind as to come some time to-morrow to see themy ears; I might seem to hold communion with that soul ingranddaughter of the old woman who kept the porter s lodge,which I felt so deeply interested, and imbibe its purestfor the girl was ill of a fever, and wished to see him.He prom-thoughts and holiest aspirations, with no alloy to such felicityised to do so.except the secret reproaches of my conscience, which wouldContents Purchase the entire Coradella Collegiate Bookshelf on CD atAnne Bronte.Agnes Grey.http://collegebookshelf.net190 191 And at what time will you be most likely to come, Mr. I would have sent the footman back for you, Miss Grey, ifWeston? The old woman will like to know when to expect you d waited a moment you needn t have taken Mr.Weston syou you know such people think more about having their umbrella, observed Rosalie, with a very unamiable cloud uponcottages in order when decent people come to see them than her pretty face.we are apt to suppose. I would have come without an umbrella, but Mr.WestonHere was a wonderful instance of consideration from the offered me the benefit of his, and I could not have refused itthoughtless Miss Murray.Mr.Weston named an hour in the more than I did without offending him, replied I, smilingmorning at which he would endeavour, to be there.By this placidly; for my inward happiness made that amusing, whichtime the carriage was ready, and the footman was waiting, would have wounded me at another time.with an open umbrella, to escort Miss Murray through the The carriage was now in motion.Miss Murray bent for-churchyard.I was about to follow; but Mr.Weston had an wards, and looked out of the window as we were passing Mr
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